Being A Nurse

Yesterday I did my first shift alone working as an LPN at a long term care and rehab facility. I think I can say I was excited for it because I have done clinicals and trained and followed around nurses countless times-it feels like-and to do things my way would be nice. 

Well..I guess I can say hopefully it can only go up hill from here. The nurse the shift before me decided she did not have time to do most her med pass and left it for me to do. I was only there for a small 4 hour shift-the time it takes to do the one med pass I am responsible for that night. Being optimistic and naive about it I figured I could do it-no big deal. 

Minus all the details of the crazy shift I ended up leaving almost 2 hours later than I was scheduled to be there because I was so busy! But that is part of nursing as I hear. I got home real late and the worse part of it all I would say is I could not sleep! ( Most people know that sleeping is very important to me.) My mind was racing about everything I did. What if I messed up?-because I was in such a rush to do things. What if I end of killing someone? What if I get fired because I did such a horrible job? 

This isn't the first time I have had this problems of not sleeping because of work. When I started my life guarding job in high school I wouldn't be able to sleep because my mind would fake me into thinking my dreams and thoughts were reality. I would sit up in bed looking around the room thinking I was life guarding and couldn't fall asleep. Yeah I guess you can call me crazy.

So right now in school my nursing classes are management/leadership and psych. I think I will have to learn from both of them from the stress nursing causes me!

I always question myself if nursing is the thing for me and if I will enjoy it.

I have another 4 hour shift tonight. I just hope I will be able to sleep.